I love cold weather. Cold weather always makes me feel like everything will work out all right.

I dont want to be the secret blog of rants. but the sad truth is when I'm truly feeling my best i dont feel like coming here. I just want to enjoy life

I dont know what worse, when someone wont let me into their heart to figure out whats wrong, or when I accidentally stumble across someones pain, even a stranger, and I suddenly have to fix it. I mean, If i have tha capability to help them, I have no right to do anything else. Their pain is now MINE and the only way to fix ME is to fix THEM. They cant break that bond by brushing away my offer for help

Nightmares of Daydreams

The dream scares me. But it isn't a nightmare, It's the opposite. Its the intersection of everything good that has come , could come, or will come her way. I'm afraid, because what if her dream of a perfect day didn't contain me? I want to tell myself to perk up, that I have to have some self confidence, but how can I build self confidence with nothing to build on? I want to belong more than anything. But I know in my heart that its impossible for it to be me, because I am outside of perfection. I cant ever live in a perfect day, even in a dream.

Its practically impossible for me to be sad on a day like this. 60 degrees, clear blue sky, a strong breeze always ruffling my hair... when I even START to get frustrated or the smile begins to fade of my face, I walk outside and cant help but break out into a silly grin and cant stop